Archive for November, 2009
Parents are always concerned with how to balance their role as parent and effectively raise happy, healthy, and respectful children. It can especially be challenging for a parent to know what to do and how to do it when your child has behavioral difficulties and he or she refuses to go to bed. Although it is common for children to need about at least a 15 minute transition to get fully settled and ready for bed, some children take this time to act out and put unrealistic demands on his or her parents. He or she becomes “tyrant” like and needs 12 bedtime stories, 252 kisses, and he or she still will not let you leave the room. Here are 3 strategies to handle bed time routines when you child takes more than 15-20 minutes to settle down and go to sleep. The first one is to make sure that you give your child at least a 10 minute warning before going to bed. It is helpful to use the TV as a natural ending time. You can even let your children know ahead of time by saying “after this show it is bed-time”. Second, after the show is over make sure you do not allow them chances to “get out” of going right away. Things like “I’m hungry, and I’m thirsty, or I have to go to the bathroom for a third time” can be legitimate request. However, it is best that the child doesn’t eat or drink anything at least 30-40 minutes before bed. Finally, if you child insist on reading a story allow them to pick one or two stories. The total reading time for a child should be between 10-15 minutes. Longer reading times than that can cause power struggles and especially when they are afraid will be used as “ammunition” to keep you there. In conclusion, also remember that your child tends to do what works. So the simplest way to change his or her difficult behavior during bed time is to not make his or her strategy work anymore. Do you want to learn exactly how to eliminate your child’s out-of-control and defiant behavior without using Punishments, Time-Outs, Behavioral Plans, or Rewards? To Download and listen to my FREE audio recordings visit: http://www.theinhomeparentcoach.com To Download My Brand New eBook – “Unleash The Parental Leader Within!” Click here… Unleash The Parental Leader Within! Jason Johnson (MSW) has spent many years working with hundreds of challenging toddlers through teenagers diagnosed with A.D.H.D, Oppositional Defiance Disorder, Conduct Disorder, Aspergers Syndrome, and Bi-polar. He has worked with children and their families in hospitals, mental health facilities, and he continues to go into client’s homes until this very day. Jason works with boys and girls (ages 2-19) with SEVERE emotional/behavioral issue from various ethnic backgrounds, races, and religions.
Use the blue bulb from the hospital to clear babies nose
No more all night kid party sessions.
Years ago, we walked a mile to school without batting an eye. Then we walked back home, stopping often at the park to play unattended, unsupervised. After all, it was a park and kids were supposed to play there. These were assumptions we took so placidly in those safer days before Madeleine McCann and Tori Stafford. The stories of these girls’ terrible abductions remind us that the situation confronting parents and caregivers is totally different in this day and age. Our kids are driven to school in buses and cars. We would think twice about letting them walk home alone, unsupervised. Allowing them to play alone in the park or woods behind the house is unthinkable. The result is that our children are growing up with less personal contact with the natural world. As Richard Louv says in his book Last Child Out of the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature Deficit Disorder, “Today, kids are aware of the global threats to the environment–but their physical contact, their intimacy with nature, is fading.” Are We Depriving Our children of a Connection with Nature that is Essential for Positive Growth and Development? This is the question Louv asks in his book. He makes a strong case for the consequences our children will suffer when deprived of an intimate relationship with the natural world. He makes the case for the growing rise of ADHD, ADD and other behavior problems as a direct consequence of a lack of contact with nature in our children’s lives. Nature Deficit Disorder is showing up as hyperactivity and violence in our society. He cites studies that show how exposure to natural settings (even for 20 minutes) increases the capacity for attention and focus in children. Students who take a 20 minute walk in the park perform better on tests of memory and attention. Other research studies show that children in public housing who have access to green space perform better emotionally and intellectually than those who do not have such access. Tests also show that just looking at nature can improve test scores. Investing in Children Louv insists that time with nature and in nature is an act of investing in our children’s health. It allows them to reconnect with a fundamental part of ourselves that is larger than life and allows them to appreciate the wisdom of cyclical and universal forces. Take our child hiking as often as we can. Replace part of our lawn with native plant. Maintain a bird bath. Have a pebble hunting party in the park or beach. Build something with the stones and pebbles collected. Build a tree house or fort in the backyard. Give our children a pet. It can teach them so much about natural wisdom. Make a daily Green Hour part of the family tradition. Bianca Tora is a writer interested in the relationship between lifestyle and the brain, specifically the area of emotional regulation and control. She has published a book on anger management for children. Visit her at http://www.help-your-child-with-anger.com
How to give your baby pain relievers
Kids missing out on nature?
End Sibling Rivalry
If you are a parent of more than one child you may find that sibling rivalry adds a great deal of stress to your life. And worse yet unfortunately, by allowing the process of sibling rivalry to work itself out, it adds additional stress to a parent’s life. The key to handling this as a parent is to be aware of the benefits of sibling rivalry and help your child enhance these skills in other positive and productive ways. Some of the skills to enhance the benefits and avoid the pitfalls of sibling rivalry are as follows:
· Always use prevention as your best defense. Since most fighting is a way to draw your attention to them, try to short circuit that from happening in the first place. You will want to incorporate special time with each child. Try to set up schedules, stick to them and make yourself available to each of your kids. You can have your kids go on special outings with each parent and do different things with each child.
· Give your kids a break from each other. If it is at all possible, separate your kids. It is important to let them have time alone while driving, at a friend’s house, visiting relatives, etc. Remember just like adults, kids need their own time and if they get cooped up in the same space for a long time they get irritated.
· Everything is not about sharing. While sharing is an integral point of getting along, often fighting occurs because kids feel out of control. Have your child choose two or three things that are theirs and theirs alone. Put the items on a shelf or in a special box and make it known that these are items that they do not have to share. This way your child feels like he has some control over his things and may be much more likely to share other items with his siblings.
· Always strive to appreciate your kids at all times. At certain times in life this can be more difficult (the teen years for one). Try to notice how often they get along without fighting. Pay special attention to their good qualities and what is unique about each child and remember that it’s their job to work things out, not yours. Remember your job as a parent is to be a role model, promote good feelings, open up clear lines of communication, develop mutual respect, and monitor your kids and their needs.
· Teach your kids to develop problem-solving skills. You want to give your kids the guidelines and skills to solve problems for themselves. Problem solving skills are often one of the things many adults lack. You can ask each kid during a family meeting how he or she can get along better with their sibling. You will want to discuss what things they might need from the other and ways to brainstorm possible solutions to these problems.
· Let go of the perfection expectations. As a parent you need to let go of your urge to worry and your expectation of being a perfect parent. The same thing goes for your kids. Despite all of your best efforts, if you have more than one child, prepare yourself that at some time they will fight and its o.k. It can also be important to learn how to roll with the punches and to ask yourself, “How big of a deal will this be in five years?” Learn how to enjoy life and laugh a little more and your kids will be better for it.
Visit http://www.surfnetparents.com for more For more parenting advice and ideas.
Favorite Books For Gentle Discipline « The Parenting Passageway
DEVELOPMENTAL/LOVING GUIDANCE: â??Mothering Your Nursing Toddlerâ? by Norma Bumgarner; ATTACHMENT PARENTING: â??Attached At The Heartâ? by Barbara Nicholson and Lysa Parker (one chapter of discipline); GENTLE DISCIPLINE: La Leche League’s …
Article from I Inform You and entitled Parenting Guides For Newbies – By Low Jeremy.
11-27-2009 Best Parenting Articles This Week | Radical Parenting
Hello Readers, Happy Thanksgiving, and Happy Birthday to my momma! She is only 27 years old this year = ). Do You Need a Blog Makeover or Social Media.
Positive Parenting Tip: Commercial Grade | mymommymanual.com
Our Yogi Parenting audio tips are presented every Friday by Michaela Turner, BS Ed, CYKT, YKT, Co-Founder Yogi Parenting Listen to this :15 AUDIO.
Libertarian Common Sense: Libertarian parenting…
The general topic of how does someone who believes in a libertarian philosophy and parenting is one that has been discussed before. Personally as a parent of five, I take a more monarchical view of parenting, I as the parent have the …
Imparting Good Values
Values are the principles you viewed to be right and important in life. One of the important areas which parents must look into when raising kids is the imparting of values to their children. Although it sounds easy but to effectively imparting your values to your children can be difficult and it needs a lot of patience and time. Parents have great effects on a child’s future lifestyle, so it will be wise to develop a positive lifestyle for your kids to follow.
So what should you be doing in order to effectively impart your values to your little ones?
1. Your children learn from you
To “do as I say and not as I do” doesn’t apply to the children of the modern world. It will only be smart to set good examples for your kids to follow because they love to learn from you. So do consider the values you will like to see in your children so that you can set an example for them to learn and follow.
For example, if you like to see politeness in your kids, you would need to display politeness when communicating with them or other people. You have to be a polite person before your child can follow your step.
Take another example; if you want your child to be humble, you would have to be humble yourself. You should not be displaying a sense of arrogance or feel too proud when dealing with people. Always eat your humble pie when you commit a mistake to show your humility. That way, they will learn from your value and follow the way you deal with things.
2. Praises means approvals
When your kids display positive behaviours, you should not forget to praise them. Praising is important because it is one of the more effective ways in which you can show your approval to them. Your children feel good and proud when they are praised by you and with such good feelings, they will want to behave positively again and again.
3. Learn from others
Whenever you see suitable situation, you can point out the positive behaviour or misdeed done to your children. Teach them the value of the good deeds done and hence, they can learn from others. There are actually a lot of such situations you can make use of. These examples can be from TV, newspaper or even when you are out shopping with them.
One important point to take note is that never compare your little ones with another child who have just did something good. If he or she is belittled by your comments, you will only cause negative effects on your child’s mind.
4. Get your children to help
I’ve seen parents stopping their child from helping with the house chores because they have a maid at home. Without having to help out in the house, their kid may grow up not knowing how to help others and expect everything to be prepared for him or her.
When children are given the chances to help out in the house, they will develop a sense of responsibility in them. With the ability to fulfill their responsibilities, they can grow up more confidently.
Imparting values can be simple when raising kids. As long as you know how to set examples, expose them to good and bad behaviours, teach and praise them, you will be able to impart your values to them easily.
Jeff Boo is an Educator with many years of teaching experience and a Father of a pair of twins. Both he and his wife are very experience in handling children If you are truly concern about your children’s learning journey, log on to http://www.essentialsforparents.com and sign up for your FREE instant access to the Children’s Resources Centre!
The Thanksgiving Post – The Parenting.com Blogs
Connect with other parents to talk about pregnancy, breastfeeding, development, health, sleeping and eating – or just to get some of those everyday frustrations off your chest.
Letters from Lin: Article #80 Parenting our Parents
Not able to live independently without some assistance, we may discover it’s time for us to parent our parents. It’s not an easy transition for any of us. I recall at my mom’s funeral, my oldest son saying to his younger brothersâ?¦ …
Parenting advice. If you happen to be the mother of a little monster angel named Oscar, who likes his weeknight routine just so, do NOT rush home from work early to spend an extra 90 minutes with him before bedtime. …
Creating Holiday Traditions « mamaTRUE: parenting as practice
I worked hard to create traditions for a nuclear small family, but when my daughter was a teen and I was a single parent, they fell apart â?? she didn’t like holidays, period. After going through several years of arguments and …
Happy (Blessed) Thanksgiving, to you, yours, and whomever else is spending it with you. Happy Thanksgiving Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun! Readers Also Liked: feeding time, grateful, holidays …
Having kids to close together?
The difference between my eldest and youngest is 18 years, however, it is not this difference in age between the youngest and eldest children that causes much of an issue, it is more so the difference in age between each individual child.
Starting from my eldest to the youngest the difference in age between children goes a little something like this:
Number 1 – Number 2 = 23 months
Number 2 – Number 3 = 14 months
Number 3 – Number 4 = 3 years, 8 months
Number 4 – Number 5 = 17 months
Number 5 – Number 6 = 23 months
Number 6 – Number 7 = 20 months
Number 7 – Number 8 = 20 months
Number 8 – Number 9 = 20 months (is there a pattern forming here ;P)
Number 9 – Number 10 = 21 months
Number 10 – Number 11 = 11 months
From the numbers above I’d have to say that the ideal difference in age between children most definitely goes to the 20-23 month period. This time gap ensured I had a full recovery from the previous pregnancy and I was able to get a consistent routine between children. By the time I found myself pregnant again I was fully able to dedicate myself to the newborn and the transition into the family was made extremely easy, this also enabled us to still provide a lot of quality time to previous children, especially the child preceding the newborn without creating any unwanted sibling rivalry or jealousy.
At 20-23 months most children are learning their own independence and although this is usually an introduction to the terrible two’s I can confidently say that this did not create too much drama for our household. All in all I favour this difference in age between children purely for the fact that there is not too much of a gap where children find communicating or playing with each other somewhat difficult, there are still moments of growth that they are able to share, experience and discover with other siblings.
Having detailed the easier spacing to deal with between children, the not so difficult but not so easy range would have to be 14-17 months. At this stage patience can be a little strained but with the tried and true routine I still believe this age gap is manageable. 14-17 months usually indicates the end to bottles and an introduction to the toddler years where walking leads to running and the discovery of one’s other senses through increased mobility. This can be a trying age when your 14-17 month doesn’t quite comprehend all instructions as adequately as an almost 2 year old, especially when you are trying to feed your newborn child.
I suggest that if your toddler is awake during feeding times for your newborn that you sit them down quietly beside you to share some reading time, have them turn the pages while you read the pages or even make up a playful story as the pages are flicked in the “no set order” that your toddler will assume or engage them in blocks or creative hand play where you can comment on the activities at hand while you continue to concentrate on providing a relaxed feeding time for baby. Enjoy the moments as much as possible and try to include your 14-17 month old in the daily routine of your newborn so there is a sense of belonging and role of importance for your toddler.
I also need to touch on the more than 3 year gap. I also have a 3 year gap between my older sister and I and I believe this difference in age between children may be hard to gauge. From experience the age gap was very challenging for me, I felt as if I always wanted to do what my older sister was doing but felt restrained due to being 3 years her junior. However the contrast I have with my own children is that my daughter is 3 years older than her brother and this doesn’t seem to have been a major issue, so I guess the gender of your child can play a major part in the difference in age between children.
At the complete other end of the spectrum is the less than 12 month period. I strongly believe that had I had an 11 month period between any of my other births, I may not have had so many children. The 11 month period between my number 10 and 11 was extremely difficult. Keeping in mind that I have a wealth of knowledge, tips and tricks from 10 previous children, we were not prepared for the 11 month gap. It came as quite a surprise as we had always wanted twins or a multiple birth but after having Troy (number 10) and Tiana (number 11) we have a new respect for parents of multiple births.
It almost became a daily struggle where both babies needed the same if not exact attention and time. Initially it was slightly easier to cope with until I returned to work when Tiana was 3 months old but this left Ieremia holding both babies and I know he has some stories to share with you all. From my experience the 11 month and under gap is extreme and possibly not something I would recommend unless of course you had alot of support from your partner or family during the first 18 months.
When all is said and done I believe that there are many contributing factors to whether there is an ideal difference in age between children but based on experience I would have to stick to the 20 month and above gap.
For more on the trials and tribulations of our family … where there’s never a dull moment and we share our experiences in raising children and welcome your queries and feedback, please feel free to visit http://www.4my11kids.com
Looking forward to “seeing you” there
Roseanne
jumping tandem: Parenting Myths and a Giveaway! The truth is that Leslie sent me a copy of her book, Parenting is Your Highest Calling (and Eight Other Myths That Trap Us In Worry and Guilt). After reading the first few pages, I knew I wanted to introduce Leslie and her book to you! … Has the Hyper-Parenting Boom Reached its Turning Point? – The … Steven Horwitz The cover story in this week’s Time is “The Growing Backlash Against Overparenting” It’s really a terrific piece that features some of the bigger names in the backlash movement (including Lenore Skenazy, the woman behind … Natural Parenting Forum – Pregnancy – Second Trimester Forum Can someone please help me !! I’m having makor baby brain this morning and cannot find the Natural Parenting section (think thats what it is called) I want to go and talk about reusable nappies. If. How Much Is Too Much Parenting? | WBUR and NPR – On Point with Tom … The backlash against over-parenting. Some call it slow parenting, free-range parenting, simplicity parenting. We’ll look at the movement, and ask if less could be more. Step Parenting: Child Custody Help | Stepfamily Magazine Step Parenting: Child Custody Help by Hera Nelsun With the high rate of divorce in this country, it is more important than ever to know what it takes to.Stop Crying by Going Outside
Television is so much a part of our lives we need to be concerned about its effect on our children. The problem is that violence in verbal and physical form appears on screen daily. Do you know that there are Studies show that violence in media does have an impact on children and adolescent behavior. Daily viewing of television in childhood can lead to behavior and social problems. What can you as parents do about this situation? 1. Monitor very closely what your children watch on TV. Even cartoons like Ninja Turtles and Power Rangers are filled with violent acts. 2. If possible, watch TV with your children and talk with them about what they have seen. Young children are often unable to separate reality from TV shows. Have a discussion with your child about what is real or not real on TV. 3. Encourage your children to look at ways TV characters handle problems. How do they resolve disagreements or issues? Do they use violence or verbal abuse? Are there different solutions other than violence? 4. If your older children have watched a PG rated movie with episodes of violence, ask them if the show or film would still be intact without the violent episodes. Does the violence enhance or detract from the film? This is one way you can help your children become savvy consumers of media. 5. Cartoons often have episodes of violence. We need to ensure that children are aware that there is a huge gulf between what happens in cartoons and what happens in real life. Help your children understand that risky actions (like jumping from a roof) would produce painful and dangerous consequences in real life. Watch your children’s reaction after watching certain cartoons. If they start acting out, that is a strong indication that those shows should be off limits until they are able to discern the difference between cartoon characters and real life. 6. Turn of the TV. Allow your children once in a while to watch approved movies without commercials or violence. The media beast can be tamed if we make television an occasional treat. There are plenty of alternatives available. How about creative play with puppets? Children can make their own shows with puppets and props. Reasonably priced and sturdy camcorders are also available for children to record their own shows. Positive communication with our children can help them negotiate their way through a media world that is becoming treacherous and slippery. Bianca Tora is a writer interested in the relationship between lifestyle and the brain, specifically the area of emotional regulation and control. She has published a book on anger management for children. Visit her at http://www.help-your-child-with-anger.com
Parenting on the View
Television Violence – deal with it
a) 6 violent acts per hour on prime time television
b) 6 violent acts per hour on children’s programs
c) 50,000 TV commercials exposed to children per year?
15 minute bedtimes
Parents are always concerned with how to balance their role as parent and effectively raise happy, healthy, and respectful children. It can especially be challenging for a parent to know what to do and how to do it when your child has behavioral difficulties and he or she refuses to go to bed.
Although it is common for children to need about at least a 15 minute transition to get fully settled and ready for bed, some children take this time to act out and put unrealistic demands on his or her parents. He or she becomes “tyrant” like and needs 12 bedtime stories, 252 kisses, and he or she still will not let you leave the room.
Here are 3 strategies to handle bed time routines when you child takes more than 15-20 minutes to settle down and go to sleep.
The first one is to make sure that you give your child at least a 10 minute warning before going to bed. It is helpful to use the TV as a natural ending time. You can even let your children know ahead of time by saying “after this show it is bed-time”.
Second, after the show is over make sure you do not allow them chances to “get out” of going right away. Things like “I’m hungry, and I’m thirsty, or I have to go to the bathroom for a third time” can be legitimate request. However, it is best that the child doesn’t eat or drink anything at least 30-40 minutes before bed.
Finally, if you child insist on reading a story allow them to pick one or two stories. The total reading time for a child should be between 10-15 minutes. Longer reading times than that can cause power struggles and especially when they are afraid will be used as “ammunition” to keep you there.
In conclusion, also remember that your child tends to do what works. So the simplest way to change his or her difficult behavior during bed time is to not make his or her strategy work anymore.
Do you want to learn exactly how to eliminate your child’s out-of-control and defiant behavior without using Punishments, Time-Outs, Behavioral Plans, or Rewards?
To Download and listen to my FREE audio recordings visit: http://www.theinhomeparentcoach.com
To Download My Brand New eBook – “Unleash The Parental Leader Within!” Click here…
Unleash The Parental Leader Within!
Jason Johnson (MSW) has spent many years working with hundreds of challenging toddlers through teenagers diagnosed with A.D.H.D, Oppositional Defiance Disorder, Conduct Disorder, Aspergers Syndrome, and Bi-polar.
He has worked with children and their families in hospitals, mental health facilities, and he continues to go into client’s homes until this very day. Jason works with boys and girls (ages 2-19) with SEVERE emotional/behavioral issue from various ethnic backgrounds, races, and religions.
Communicating calmly - parenting 101
How to solve Separation Anxiety with Your Kids
Many children go through a phase in which they show anxiety and restlessness in the presence of unfamiliar people or situations. A baby may be unsettled by a new babysitter. A four year old may cry persistently during the first few days at kindergarten. These are perfectly normal situations and reactions.
One in every 25 children experiences some form of separation anxiety which can often be allayed by allowing the child to have a period of adjustment to his new situation. However, a child five or older who demonstrates unremitting resistance to camp, school or daycare for an extended period of time (3 weeks or more) may be suffering from separation anxiety disorder.
What is Separation Anxiety Disorder?
This is a condition in which the child becomes physically agitated over the thought of being separated from his primary caregiver or home. It is not confined to children. Adults can experience separation anxiety as well; it is known as “agoraphobia,” or fear of being separated from a safe person or home. “Agora” in Greek means marketplace and the word “agoraphobic” refers to people who are terrified of leaving home for the market.
What are the Symptoms of Separation Anxiety Disorder?
- The child complains of headaches or stomach aches. Sometimes he or she throws temper tantrums.
- The child has an irrational fear that something bad will happen if she leaves the house or caregiver.
- The child shows unusual concern about being kidnapped or taken away.
- The child fears that the caregiver might die.
- The child fears being alone, even in a separate room.
- The child has nightmares of being separated.
- The child cannot fall asleep unless caregiver is nearby.
What Can Be Done about Separation Anxiety Disorder?
If the child’s anxiety is so excessive it interferes with normal functioning at home and at school, it is wise to consult professional help. Cognitive Behavioral Therapies provide a framework in which children can learn about their fears and how to deal with them.
In essence, Cognitive Behavioral Therapies help children identify negative thoughts rather than external events, as the source of anxious feelings and behavior. They also help children develop skills for self reliance and self help. They help them practice alternative responses to anxiety so that new neural pathways can replace old circuitry in the brain. Achievement of goal is predicated on the children’s ability to unlearn old patterns and replacing them with new responses.
Why is Professional Treatment important?
Research suggests that anxiety disorders in children should be taken seriously and that parents should seek professional treatment because untreated children usually perform poorly at school, have repeated absences from school, experience problems relating with peers and siblings or become alcohol or drug dependent when they grow older.
Bianca Tora is a writer interested in the relationship between lifestyle and the brain, specifically the area of emotional regulation and control. She has published a book on anger management for children. Visit her at http://www.help-your-child-with-anger.com
Stop Crying by Going Outside
New baby? Don’t forget your partner.
Many times parents are concerned about their relationship when a new child enters into this world. It can be especially challenging for new parents to know what to do and how to do it when there is a new life brought into the relationship when there was once only two people.
It is common for either the new father or new mother to feel left out or “unattended” when new children come into the relationship. This set up becomes unhealthy for the couples when they begin to fight several times a day because of the new setup.
Here are some strategies to handle the new set up with the baby being a part of the relationship.
When you are co-parenting with your spouse it is extremely important that you put that relationship first. When you have children together you must remember that you were first husband and wife (or boyfriend or girlfriend) before you were mom and dad. Too often children become a part of the family and wind up taking over all physical and emotional time and attention.
It is important for fathers to understand that your wife will be obsessed with the baby for the first year or so. It is important for fathers to be aware of this shift and attempt not to take it personal. You will feel left out; however your wife still loves and cares for you even though it doesn’t feel that way as you watch her constantly worry, think about, and only talk about the baby.
It is important for mothers to understand that the baby has many needs, however your husband still needs your time and attention. Make sure you schedule in time and reserve some energy to nurture the relationship with you and your husband. Sometimes you may have to schedule a date night or alone time once a week.
In conclusion, the first year or two will be a time of major transition for a couple when a child is born. What was once a partnership involving two is now ‘living for three”. Be patient with yourself and with your spouse as you go through the new and exciting time in your life.
Do you want to learn exactly how to eliminate your child’s out-of-control and defiant behavior without using Punishments, Time-Outs, Behavioral Plans, or Rewards?
To Download and listen to my FREE audio recordings visit: http://www.theinhomeparentcoach.com
To Download My Brand New Ebook- “Unleash The Parental Leader Within!” Click here…
Unleash The Parental Leader Within!
Jason Johnson (MSW) has spent many years working with hundreds of challenging toddlers through teenagers diagnosed with A.D.H.D, Oppositional Defiance Disorder, Conduct Disorder, Aspergers Syndrome, and Bi-polar.
He has worked with children and their families in hospitals, mental health facilities, and he continues to go into client’s homes until this very day. Jason works with boys and girls (ages 2-19) with SEVERE emotional/behavioral issue from various ethnic backgrounds, races, and religions.
Being a job quitter professional novel finisher, you get to watch things you wouldnt ordinarily get a chance to watch.
Mothers Who Share Parenting: 'It's simply co-parentingâ??putting the …
And of course we share the parenting of our two children equally. I say â??of courseâ? because I can’t imagine it any other way. I am often astounded at the parenting arrangements I see that are anything but shared. …
Lesbian Parenting Issues | Woman Frenzy
If you look into the eyes of a homeless orphan do you think that child would mind if he or she had two mommies of two daddies as long as someone loved, fed, and clothed the child.
CROSS-eyed: Parenting Assumptions
In chapter 1 of Gospel-Powered Parenting, William Farley lays out 5 fundamental parenting assumptions. Powerful stuff! 1. You cannot be a perfect parent. Parenting reminds us of our need for the gospel. …
The popularity factor Mom's Parenting Blog by Aliki McElreath …
Sometimes, at challenging parenting moments like that one, I find any advice I try to give out to my kids ends up sounding canned, or abstract, or just unconvincing–kind of the way I remember the advice my parents’ gave me sounding to …
Providing the child the most optimal environment for developing his foundation for life can be a daunting period. You will not succeed. You will face obstacles seemingly out of your control, violence on TV as well as overwhelming propaganda, the limiting factor of the school system, the child and their piers and your short comings just to name a few. One thing for sure is the best thing you can equip the child with for living life is for them to get that the measurement of success in life is in the amount of joy experienced. That is the condition the parents can influence their family to pursue. This is the greatest gift that can be instilled in children by any adult. It is critical in my view that children have the self confidence that is strong enough to overcome the oftentimes brutal effects the institution of forced schooling can have on the child. The range of quality schools varies tremendously and generally speaking there are but a few that are enlightened enough to provide the kind of environment we are discussing here. Compulsitory schooling by nature is limiting not expansive. If a child leaves school with a sense of himself displaying all the confidence and enthusiasm for a satisfying and fulfilling life, the experience was worthwhile. This article isn’t about schools however; it is about providing some insight into the necessity of putting and keeping in place for the first five years of a child life the primary conditions for successful living. You can not hide your child from all the elements of life that will be encountered, because that is part of life. Surprise will always be there. But you can assist a child in understanding the principles that can enable them to face any experience in a way that leaves them stronger in their sense of who they are, not less. You will make mistakes no matter what you do. And the advice you would give your child when they make a mistake in life will be by the way you handle the mistakes you make with them. For they learn by example. Children learn how ‘be’ by their observation of how others are being, especially their parents. How you ‘be’ matters more than you know. Remember this, the body is a multi-sensory organism, and even as an infant, it is interpreting of over 400 billion pieces of data per second. That is difficult to comprehend. Based on the conclusions it has made to date, its beliefs and assumptions about life, the brain then is processing one hundred thousand chemicals sending them to the cells of the body. The point is you are incapable of fooling the child in terms of what it is reading in your behavior around them. If you are being inauthentic they will know. Even if they are not capable of reading you intellectually, they will read you emotionally. If the child learns that seeking happiness is the greatest pursuit, they will have learned it because they observed that you lived your life that way. Okay, here is the good news. If our aim is to be joyful in life, we will have taught our children the most important and fundamental purpose of life. The natural unfolding will be the continuing discovery of what works to have a great life. The child and parent will discover along the way, everything that is necessary to live a life that allows all their dreams to come to pass. Happiness and joy is a state or condition in which freedom, no resistance, and love reign. It obeys the law of attraction as an absolute. It abides by the teaching, ‘do unto others as you would have them to undo you’, but never at the expense of your own happiness in life. Long before I had my children I remember saying I wasn’t going to raise my mine the way I was raised. Matter of fact I’ve heard quite a few parents utter those words. Age has made me wiser. And for the most part I didn’t, but that didn’t mean that the influence of my own childhood didn’t somehow shape the father I became. No matter how your childhood was for you, it affords you the insight on how you’ll choose to be when you embark on the adventure of parenthood. And of course if you are about to or if you are already raising your children, this is only the beginning. It can and should be the most enjoyable ‘adventure’ of your life. It is kind of an adventure in that you only get to enjoy it as it unfolds. The best advice I could give parents in raising their children is to bring joy to every moment that you possibly can. It is in joy that the child creates the most optimal foundation of self love. Those first five years are so critical, it’s immeasurable. Of course every year thereafter is critical as well but the child is the deliberate creator of his or her own story. And doing their next five years having become familiar with previous will be of great assistance. A low self esteem plays a difficult burden on the years in front of anyone. If you can be the best parent you can for the first 5 years, no doubt you will have trained yourself long enough to continue being that way. You are only teaching yourself really. Just another note in this vast topic the most brilliant awareness information I have found for parenting is in the study of the law of attraction. Affirm the best in your child every time you can and find the best interpretations for the rest. Never emphasize apparent fault but look for aspects that work. If you understand about the power of directing your emotions in a particular kind of way, I invite you to visit and learn about the iCap. http://www.insightsforworkability.com Biofeedback has advanced beyond our imagination. You can discover and manage your emotions such as to seek and discover more joy and happiness than you can imagine. And because of the personal computer, the cost is affordable and the advances have been remarkably pleasing. Stop by when you can.
Parenting on the View
First five years of being a parent
Leon Cautillo, Author/Instructor